... and another thing

Two things, actually, to add to the pot of "why I became a skeptic".

One was the Brick Testament. For those of you who haven't seen it, it's a quite clever illustration of parts of the Bible (OT and NT) with lego bricks. Some of it is hysterically funny, which was why a friend showed it to me. But some of it was quite confronting, particularly parts of Nach that are rarely studied or brushed over. Samson is a particular highlight.

This is what God looks like according to the BT, which I think says it all:



It's funny to think that some lego men can have an effect on one's faith. But the juxtaposition of children's toys and some of the most gruesome parts of Tanach is clever. It highlights exactly how gruesome, how sexist, and how racist parts of our holy book are. This is a book that's meant to give us truth, meant to guide us through life, regardless of the generation. Of course there are many wonderful parts of Tanach as well, but huge chunks of it are pretty much a guide of what not to do if you want to win friends and influence people.

The other thing was the deaths of several of our close family members in close succession. The first was tragic, the end of a wonderful life in its prime. The next two were older, fuller lives lived, but were further kicks in the gut while we were down. And the last was another relatively young person.

I won't dwell too much on the emotional side of things only because it's not immediately relevant, not because it's not there. But on a philosophical level, it really makes you think. What does it all mean? Is premature death a punishment? If so, is it a punishment for the person who died, or those left behind? How does God balance the books when dealing with a whole family, not just an individual?

As you can probably tell I don't want to go into too many details here. But the first death, almost three years ago, caused irreparable damage to our family. After the fallout I found myself trying to work it out. What had we done to deserve this? In a family noted for being baalei tzedakah, for involvement in the community, for kindness within and outside of the family. Good, simple Jews, not learned for the most part through various circumstances, but really, just great people.

And that's when the whole idea of reward and punishment started to unravel for me. And life after death. I just started seeing everything as far more random. Sure, there are some crazy coincidences out there. But I can no longer see them as any more than just that.