How to treat a skeptic

Over the chagim I've had some extra time on my hands, which of course I spent reading. I read some chapters of Leaves of Faith by Rav Aharon Lichtenstein and also some of Jewish Values in a Changing World by Rav Yehuda Amital. I'm much more of a Rav Lichteinstein fan than a Rav Amital fan, but my husband recommended Chapter 16, entitled "How to relate to one who has lost his faith" (or her faith, I presume).

He doesn't provide any magic answers, but that's no surprise. I'm pretty sure that if there was a magic answer I'd have heard it by now. But he does provide an interesting perspective on skeptics.

In summary...

He discusses the various types of heretics and focuses on four different categories.
1. One who doesn't believe in some principles of faith because of "erroneous reasoning". Rav Amital holds that such a person is considered to be coerced by his logic and not held accountable.
2. He discusses the reason that is traditionally held as the reason of all skeptics: the yetzer hara (evil inclination). Apparently it is this type of heretic that should be "thrown in the pit". Rav Amital says: "Many people come to a secular outlook not in order to satisfy their desires, but rather because of their dedication to ideals that may, at times, even demand great sacrifice. It is difficult to pin all disbelief on following one's desires."
3. Real, certain denial of God. It's rare because most atheists will concede that they can't prove for certain that there's no God. He doesn't give a clear conclusion about what he thinks of those who do deny God with absolute certainty.
4. The classic tinok shenishba (captured infant). People not raised in OJ are considered blameless.

He cites the Chazon Ish about the "thrusting in the pit" halacha. Basically, according to the Chazon Ish this law would only apply when God's presence was clear in the world. Now that it's not, "'thrusting down' does not serve to fill the breach, but rather it adds to it".

And he talks about the shift in anti-Semitism from hatred of people who keep Jewish practises (in medieval times, etc, when conversion was a way to escape persecution), to hatred of Jews because they are Jews ("In Auchwitz, they did not check people's tzitit before sending them to the gas chambers.")

He also says that ahavat Yisrael is needed to run the State of Israel, and that a positive attitude will have more of an effect in bringing people back to Judaism than a negative one.

Now, obviously his agenda is quite different from mine, but I found this worthwhile reading for a few reasons.

1. It provided recognition that we're not all skeptics because we can't be bothered keeping the Torah.
2. I agree 100% that a harsh attitude only serves to push people away. It's certainly the case for me. I don't think anything will de-skeptic me but overall I have a positive attitude to Judaism as a culture and I'd like to retain that. Some people don't make it easy.
3. I agree with his comments about the Holocaust. Anyone that was Jewish enough for Hitler should be Jewish enough for other Jews.
4. The bolded quote above. That's me. The ideal I'm dedicated to is intellectual honesty.